GABANNA

Platonic Snuggles

Fact: girls like snuggling.

Fact: boys …not so much.

As luck would have it, one random trip back to our old college led to me finding an excellent snuggle buddy. Don’t believe me? Check this out.

Once upon a time Dolce and I were trying to figure out something to do on the upcoming weekend. Both discovering that we had off of work that weekend, we decided to make a spontaneous trip to our old school. We made a few phone calls, packed up the car, and got the hell off of Long Island.

Friday night at our school is known for one thing: happy hour. Luckily for us, we arrived just in time. Dropping our stuff at Dolce’s sister’s dorm, we changed quickly and headed to the bars to stock up on some cheap pitchers. Nearly bursting with excitement, we ran into the bar and immediately found our old friends Pete and Joe-Joe.

Needless to say, they were delighted that their favorite party girls had come to spend the weekend. We proceeded to take advantage of the amazing deal on cheap beer, and spent several hours playing ridiculous games and taking pictures (what else do you do at happy hour?)

Once happy hour was over Joe-Joe invited us to go back to his place and drink more before hitting up the bars again later that night. After making a pit stop at the gas station to stock up on beer and Doritos, we headed over to his place. Once inside, we met his roomie Mitch. He was a sophomore who wasn’t going out that night because he had homework. (I know right? Pathetic.) Naturally, Dolce and I got on his case and convinced him to pregame with us.

Twenty minutes later we were playing our new favorite drinking game. We turned on Anchorman (our fave movie) and had to drink anytime they said 4 specific words, which I obviously don’t remember. 


Around midnight Dolce and I decided we were ready to hit up the bar, where our good friend Hannah was bartending. The boys stayed back and continued to pregame and told us they would meet with us later.

We skipped off to the bar and met up with Hannah and some other friends, and Dolce immediately went off with one of the guys she met last time she visited, Andrew. After a while of hanging with the guys we decided to hit up another bar, not even thinking that I was leaving Dolce behind. As I was crossing the street I hear her yelling my name and see her running toward me with Andrew.

 “We’re leaving,” she told me. “You good?”

“Yup! Text me so I know you’re alive!” We said our goodbyes and I headed back to the bar to find the guys. Once I got in, Joe-Joe announced he was leaving, and Pete told me to go stay with him and he would meet us later. We walked back to his apartment and Mitch came out to give me pillows and blankets for the couch I was crashing on.

As the boys were saying goodnight I decided that I didn’t want to sleep alone. “Can I platonically snuggle with one of you?”

They both just stared at me. “Pleaseeeee, what if I get cold and where is Pete gonna sleep when he comes home and please I just wanna snuggle please please pleaseeeee?” I drunkenly ranted.

Laughing, Joe-Joe said that he had a girlfriend who wouldn’t be too happy if we snuggled, and we both turned to Mitch.

“I guess…”

“YAY!” I yelled as I pranced into his room. “I’m also going to need pajamas. I can’t sleep in my skirt!” Being the chivalrous gentleman that he was, he handed me a pair of sweatpants as I walked into the kitchen to change. (Where else would I go? After the way this night is going would you expect anything else?)

I hopped back into the bed and was never snuggled so well in my life. Unfortunately, it was cut short at 7am when I woke up out of a dead sleep to Dolce calling me. “Let me in bitch!”

I opened the door and she laughed at how ridiculous I looked in my borrowed clothes, and we walked back to Mitch’s room. “He’s an excellent snuggler,” I said as I climbed back into bed.

“Can I have some sweatpants?” Dolce asked. “I can’t sleep in my dress.”

He groaned and pointed in the direction of the sweatpants, which she put on and climbed into bed with us. He was clearly surprised when we both put our heads on his chest and proceeded to talk about our nights. After a while we felt bad about waking him up so early on a Saturday and left, still wearing his clothes. We walk of shamed though town (in front of children I might add. Their parents got them out of our path pretty quickly) and headed back to the dorms, and a few hours later I received a message: “Can I have my pants back?”

After some serious debate about whether or not we should give the clothes back, our conscious’ won and we dropped the clothes back on his front porch. I still regret giving those pants back; they were that comfortable.

The end.

Alright fine you caught me. We met up with Mitch, Joe-Joe and the boys Saturday night and wound up crashing at their house again. It was no longer a platonic snuggle, but a make-out snuggle sesh. This time I got to wear a neon yellow shirt that represented what a hick he was that I seriously debated stealing, but once again gave it back. I still think about the amazingness of that shirt…

The end. For real this time.

Rules of Platonic Snuggling:

-Give back clothes or else there is the potential of losing the platonic snuggler; they’re very protective of their clothes. As they should be-they’re so freaking comfortable.

-If you’re a good snuggler, you’ll get the clothes back. Maybe.

-Don’t kiss the platonic snuggler, because then it becomes a hook-up.

-Yes girls, there really are guys out there who do just want to snuggle. No, they’re not all gay.